Back Rowe Reviews
Real Time Movie Reviews from the Back Row of a Theater

Eight Below (PG)

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Directed by: Frank Marshall
Starring: Paul Walker
February 2006

“Standard Arctic Survival Tale Will Leave You Cold”


Most desktop publishing applications for computers come with templates or wizards—quick helps that allow the user to customize pre-existing models, often in order to save time and effort. When it comes to storytelling, there are a limited number of plots (templates), but what makes each story unique is the location, the execution of the plot, the different types of characters and how those characters interact with each other.

In the case of Disney’s new “based on a true story” family film,
Eight Below, the writers and producers—in what they probably thought was a low-risk, high-profit move—have simply given us the template itself. Arctic (or Antarctic) survival stories have been done so many times that anyone attempting such a project should approach it with a great deal of caution and trepidation…and more than just a few original ideas. Unfortunately for Eight Below (which is really a misnomer—eight refers to the number of sled dogs, but the temperature dips well below minus fifty degrees in the movie), it offers nothing new, but banks on cute dogs and maudlin moments to bail out the unoriginal screenplay and uninspired performances.

Jerry Shepard (Paul Walker) and his colorful companions, motor-mouth, Charlie Cooper (
American Pie’s Jason Biggs) and Native American hottie, Katie (Moon Bloodgood), work at a base at “the bottom of the world.” Jerry, an experienced survival guide, begrudgingly transports American geologist Davis McClaren (Bruce Greenwood) to nearby Mt. Melbourne, where meteorites from Mercury have reportedly landed. Along with his team of well-groomed, well-trained dogs, Jerry totes McClaren and his equipment across the frozen, Antarctic plain, which is filled with bottomless crevasses, patches of thin ice and frightening leopard seals. The expedition is cut short when a massive snow storm moves in; the race home nearly costs McClaren his life (I wish I had a dollar for every time he falls in the movie) and Jerry’s fingers to frostbite. The base is evacuated and the dogs are left behind with the intention of immediately returning for them, but the severity of the blizzard prohibits any flights from returning to the base until the next spring. What ensues is tantamount to The Incredible Journey as the dogs break free from their chains, work together as a team, and feast on seagulls and a beached killer whale (the best visual in the movie) until they’re rescued by Jerry and his reassembled team…some 180 days after being stranded.

Director Frank Marshall does an adequate job with mediocre material; a script suggested by the real life Japanese expedition to Antarctica in 1957. Unfortunately, Marshall doesn’t receive any assistance from his gelid, no-name cast, and in the end, it’s only the sled dogs that are remotely memorable (Mya in particular). Some would argue that this formula still works, judging from the sniffles heard among the audience at tear-inducing moments, but this brand of sentimental survival tale reached its height somewhere in the late 70’s with the Robert Logan pictures. Suggested improvements for the sequel: have the dogs deliver the lines and let the leopard seal eat McClaren.

Rating: 2